’ You mean you hope you do, thought Gerald cynically. What a fool I was to separate the two in my mind. I know I am undeserving of your bounty; but if I were to tell you what hardships I have undergone—to what frightful extremities I have been reduced—and to what infamy I have submitted, to earn a scanty subsistence for this child's sake, —if you could feel what it is to stand alone in the world as I do, bereft of all who have ever loved me, and shunned by all who have ever known me, except the worthless and the wretched,—if you knew (and Heaven grant you may be spared the knowledge!) how much affliction sharpens love, and how much more dear to me my child has become for every sacrifice I have made for him,—if you were told all this, you would, I am sure, pity rather than reproach me, because I cannot at once consent to a separation, which I feel would break my heart. “Of course I will,” he answered. He understood. The girl nodded sagely. He was so depressed and disheartened that he did not then believe he would ever write again. A siphon and a whisky bottle stood before him. I came to the Beck’s house. He’ll survive. I don’t think I shall ever care for this bonnet again. How on earth does it concern you?” Annabel laughed hardly. —You've your answer, Blueskin," he added, pushing that individual, who seemed unwilling to depart, towards the door; "it's useless to urge the matter further. Here it is.
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