He was a good foster dad that had never so much as leered at her, not even once. It would have been better had he succeeded in murdering her, she thought. And in those days, too, he used to help her mother with her gardening, and hover about her while she stood on the ladder and hammered creepers to the scullery wall. At the eastern gate of the churchyard stood the carriage with the steps lowered. Instead, you are willing to go to a place like that where you ought not to be allowed to think of showing yourself. She was never able to trace the changes her attitude had undergone, from the time when she believed herself to be the pampered Queen of Fortune, the crown of a good man’s love (and secretly, but nobly, worshipping some one else), to the time when she realized she was in fact just a mannequin for her lover’s imagination, and that he cared no more for the realities of her being, for the things she felt and desired, for the passions and dreams that might move her, than a child cares for the sawdust in its doll. Either you have had to love people or hate them—which is a sort of love, too, in its way—to get anything out of them. “P. Then she stood up and looked around the room. I know nothing about the matter, but I feel convinced that you are right. Attempt to molest me, and I split. They were only passers-by. As far as I can, I belong to them all. Bought her a nose job for her sixteenth birthday along with a car, I forget what model, but it was a nice car, a Mercedes convertible.
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